{"id":1658,"date":"2008-04-28T19:24:23","date_gmt":"2008-04-28T23:24:23","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/brandywinebooks.net\/?p=1658"},"modified":"2008-04-28T19:24:23","modified_gmt":"2008-04-28T23:24:23","slug":"the-vegetable-is-gorgeous","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/brandywinebooks.net\/?p=1658","title":{"rendered":"“The vegetable is gorgeous!”"},"content":{"rendered":"

We married off the Older Niece<\/strong> down in Iowa this weekend, and it was one of the better weddings I\u2019ve attended, I think. They chose to do the whole thing low-key, low pressure.<\/p>\n

So I had to make my own pressure.<\/p>\n

I left too late. I should have left at 7:30 a.m. at the latest on Saturday, but I thought that if I waited till 8:00 I could drop off the package I\u2019d promised to mail to my new publisher at the Post Office, and still have plenty of time.<\/p>\n

Unfortunately the Post Office doesn\u2019t open till 9:00.<\/p>\n

So I hit the road (taking care to go around the area where they\u2019ve closed off Highway 35 south, at Highway 62, for repair). We had snow on the ground, and a nasty west wind was shooting across my bow. <\/p>\n

I stopped in Faribault, the town of my birth, to mail the package there.<\/p>\n

Unfortunately, although I was born in Faribault I never lived in Faribault, so I\u2019d completely forgotten where the Post Office was. I found it at last, but lost some more time.<\/p>\n

Then, just by the Owatonna Cabela\u2019s, the grill of my car flew off. I assume this was the delayed result of the accident I had last winter, when the young woman wiped my front bumper off in the drug store parking lot.<\/p>\n

Since I\u2019d had the bumper reattached in a fairly slapdash manner, I assumed it was the bumper that had gone, along with my front license plate. So I made a circuit at the nearest exits, to retrieve it.<\/p>\n

I found nothing worth salvaging. But my hat did blow off, across the oncoming lanes. I retrieved it at considerable risk to life and limb. And more lost time.<\/p>\n

I pulled in to the church exactly ten minutes before the service began. Which meant that I had to read the Scripture lesson they\u2019d ask me to read, cold.<\/p>\n

Fortunately I\u2019m an excellent cold reader.<\/p>\n

Humorous highlights: The report of a comment of a bridesmaid, while shopping for a dress: \u201cI\u2019d rather drink toilet water than be in another wedding!\u201d<\/i><\/p>\n

A subtitle from a Korean horror movie which The Younger Niece sent The Older Niece from China. There\u2019s a scene where an actress creeps into a bathroom and pulls back a shower curtain, to find some kind of monster lurking in there.<\/p>\n

She runs away, screaming words in Korean.<\/p>\n

Her words, as translated in the subtitles: \u201cTHE VEGETABLE IS GORGEOUS!\u201d<\/i><\/p>\n

Can\u2019t tell you how many times I\u2019ve had the exact same sentiment.<\/p>\n

To top it all off, I borrowed a book from my brother which turned out to be absolutely delightful, and part of a series of which there are several more to enjoy. I\u2019ll review it as soon as I\u2019m finished with it.
<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

We married off the Older Niece down in Iowa this weekend, and it was one of the better weddings I\u2019ve attended, I think. They chose to do the whole thing low-key, low pressure. So I had to make my own pressure. I left too late. I should have left at 7:30 a.m. at the latest … Continue reading “The vegetable is gorgeous!”<\/span> →<\/span><\/a><\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":2,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"nf_dc_page":"","_monsterinsights_skip_tracking":false,"_jetpack_newsletter_access":"","_jetpack_dont_email_post_to_subs":false,"_jetpack_newsletter_tier_id":0,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paywalled_content":false,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paid_content":false,"footnotes":"","jetpack_post_was_ever_published":false},"categories":[1],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-1658","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-uncategorized"],"jetpack_likes_enabled":true,"jetpack_sharing_enabled":true,"jetpack_featured_media_url":"","_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/brandywinebooks.net\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/1658","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/brandywinebooks.net\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/brandywinebooks.net\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/brandywinebooks.net\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/users\/2"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/brandywinebooks.net\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcomments&post=1658"}],"version-history":[{"count":0,"href":"https:\/\/brandywinebooks.net\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/1658\/revisions"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/brandywinebooks.net\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fmedia&parent=1658"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/brandywinebooks.net\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcategories&post=1658"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/brandywinebooks.net\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Ftags&post=1658"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}