How to Fend Off a Shark, from the guys who wrote the guide to surviving worst case scenarios. In short, hit the shark back.
All posts by Phil
A Gorgeous Comedy of Classes
Yesterday, my wife and I saw Pixar’s Ratatouille on a digital screen at the Rave Theater in East Ridge. It was fantastic, hilarious, and heartening. The director describes it as a story about achieving impossible dreams, and maybe that’s the idea I was smiling so much about afterward, but I worded it differently. A food critic says that though everyone cannot be a great artist, a great artist can come from anywhere. As the story’s featured cookbook claims, “Anyone can cook.” That means you, especially if you see our society or select industries against you.
I heard an interview this week with a woman who said that while studying drama at Harvard in the ’70s she was encouraged to pursue children’s theater, “because women can’t direct theater.” Neither she nor the NPR interviewer wanted to believe such an idea was common at Harvard in those days. But that idea is everywhere, is it not? Someone may tell you that being the type of person you are prevents you from accomplishing your goal, but it ain’t necessarily so.
Dream your impossible dream. Work on it no matter what the chances of success, and do it all to the glory of your Lord and Savior. You may be a great artist–no matter who you are. You won’t find out unless you try.
Don’t Bother Getting Published
“I’ve lost count of the number of emails I get asking for advice on how to get published. My initial reaction is ‘Why bother?’ when being unpublished is such fun and so satisfying,” writes Beth Webb. “Getting published by a mainstream company is great, but in all honesty, how many of us can really afford to give up the day job, even when we’ve signed that contract? Such a long, heartbreaking haul for what? The joy of writing should be just that – the writing.”
There’s something to this, but I don’t what. (via Books, Inq.)
Turn Off the News and Don’t Slug Your Barber
If you find yourself frustrated with politics or elections this year or next, I have two recommendations for you. First, turn off the news for a week. Sure the earth will probably burn at the poles because you aren’t staying informed, but that’s a risk you should take for your peace of mind. Turning off the news, especially TV news, will help you get your mind off bothersome things you can’t control and allow you to worry about personal things you can’t control. That’s called relaxation.
Second, read Flannery O’Connor’s short story “The Barber.” It’s a humorous little tale about a professor who feels compelled to argue politics with his thick-headed barber. Though the professor calls himself a liberal, I think the story will appeal to anyone who believes he has good reasons on his side and the opposition is all cliché.
I should say upfront I’m not sure of O’Connor’s main point in this story. You could easily take away the idea that arguing politics with anyone is worthless, as one character recommends, but I’m not willing to stop there. The professor’s passion and humiliation seem to better address the idea that it’s worthless to argue with some people. The barber is clearly a fool, and I’m sure O’Connor was familiar with the Proverbs on fools.
A scoffer seeks wisdom in vain,
but knowledge is easy for a man of understanding.
Leave the presence of a fool,
for there you do not meet words of knowledge.
The wisdom of the prudent is to discern his way,
but the folly of fools is deceiving. (Proverbs 14:6-8 ESV)
It may be just the story to entertain you when you’re frustrated with candidates and commenters, but whatever your position on the issues this year and no matter what your barber says to you, don’t sock him in the face, okay? As a great politician once said, it wouldn’t be prudent.
Focus on Character
If Flannery had a blog, she might post a bit of writing advice on occasion.
You would probably do just as well to get that plot business out of your head and start simply with a character or anything that you can make come alive…Wouldn’t it be better for you to discover a meaning in what you write rather than to impose one? Nothing you write will lack meaning because the meaning is in you.
Why Should He Know Her Name?
I just learned of a new fantasy novel, Auralia’s Colors, coming this summer from WaterBrook Press. It could be interesting, engaging, even good. I see that Books & Culture’s John Wilson calls it “a vivid and continuous dream.” You can read the first chapter on the author’s site.
At this point, I should probably shut up, but we talk about the craft of writing every now and then on BwB, so in that vein, what do you think of these opening lines?
Auralia lay still as death, like a discarded doll, in a burgundy tangle of rushes and spineweed on the bank of a bend in the River Throanscall, when she was discovered by an old man who did not know her name.
She bore no scars, no broken bones, just the stain of inkblack soil. Contentedly, she cooed, whispered, and babbled, learning the river’s language, and focused her gaze on the stormy dance of evening sky roiling purple clouds edged with blood red. The old man surmised she was waiting and listening for whoever, or whatever, had forsaken her there.
So the little girl lay there cooing and babbling as still as death? How does that work? Wasn’t she moving her mouth? And she was discovered by an old man who did not know her name? Why should he know her name? He’s just discovered her. I would be surprised if he knew her beforehand.
I Won’t Lead with a Paris Hilton Story
MSNBC’s Mika Brzezinski won’t lead the news with a story on Paris Hilton getting out of jail. This is remarkable. Her bosses had better treat her well.
A Short Short Contest
Maxine points out a short short contest on a UK blog. I love this type of story. I remember Story magazine did this during it’s short life span. One about a boy wearing a wig at the breakfast table has stuck with me for years. I may enter this contest, but I don’t know how much time I have.
Baby Names
Speaking of Britain, there’s a story of a little girl born in the last few days with an unusual name. I’m glad I can copy-n-paste this. Her name is Autumn Sullivan Corbett Fitzsimmons Jeffries Hart Burns Johnson Willard Dempsey Tunney Schmeling Sharkey Carnera Baer Braddock Louis Charles Walcott Marciano Patterson Johansson Liston Clay Frazier Foreman Brown. For real.
But not as for real as the proposed name of a New Zealand baby. His parents want to name him “4Real.”
Someone save us.
The Stirring Voice of Paul Potts
Have you seen this video of Britain’s Got Talent winner Paul Potts? A Bristol, England, native walks on stage, feeling nervous, and does not impress the judges by claiming a desire to sing opera. Oh, but when he sings! He went to the semi-finals to sing “A Time To Say Goodbye,” and returned to his first song in the finals, “Nessun Dorma.” Now he has a £1m record deal with Simon Cowell’s label and plans to sing with Katherine Jenkins at a Wales event.
Bravo!!