Hey, kids! It’s National Environmental Education Week. What NEEW this year? (heh, heh) We’re focusing on our carbon footprint. You know the earth is warming up, baking polar bears, and flooding the innocent people of Manhattan Beach because of your wasteful lifestyle. Shame on you. The government isn’t doing its part, so you have to do yours. And here’s a simple thing you can do to help the planet.
Don’t fart.
Did you know that the average person farts 16 times a day? That’s excess CO2, Nitrogen, and other gazes in our atmosphere. Not good. Let’s team up to fight global warming by not farting.
Think it’s impossible? Try avoiding food. Eating is a major cause in human farting, so maybe you should just eat a little less, if at all. For pete’s sake, people! We’re all going to die if we don’t do something, so help out a little.
Tags: global warming, climate change, neew, prevention
The idea of limiting human generated wind by cutting down on the fuel used dovetails nicely with the notion of Calorie Restriction. There are many who think calorie restriction is the key to longevity. Any I’ve seen speaking on the subject are unsmiling, pinched, and not good representatives of the sort of golden years I’d care to live.
(And now I’m very curious as to whether I’m above or below average.)
Don’t fart? Talk about being legalistic Phil.
P.S. I enjoyed the quote by Benchley. In my younger days (spending hours and hours on buses) I loved reading his stuff. (I once loaned a book of his to a friend, with the highest of recommendations… and got back a lame ‘huh?’ Humor… a very funny business.)
http://www.m4gw.com They have a hilarious video on YouTube.
Sod, that is funny. Thanks for pointing it out.
Elmer and Daryl long for some Global Warming.
That “simple thing” we can do to help the environment isn’t always so simple, for some people.
You’ll note that a good way to get comments on a post on this blog is to talk about farting.
Something we can all identify with.
Just what are you saying, Michael? The planet is on the verge of spontaneous combustion, and are you saying you can’t hold it in a little?
ok, I need to shut up.
This is the way the world ends,
Not with a bang but a ripping.
LOL