(The scene opens with a shot of an American suburban kitchen. AMANDA is seen standing at a counter with a cardboard box in her hand. Her daughter HEATHER enters and observes what she’s doing.)
HEATHER: Mom, what are you doing with that rat poison?
AMANDA: I’m going to put some out, honey. I saw a rat in the pantry, and I can’t stand rats.
HEATHER (putting her hands on her hips): Mom! You can’t do that!
AMANDA: Why not?
HEATHER: Don’t you listen to the news? They told us about it in school. You can’t poison rats. It’s against the law.
AMANDA: Against the law to use rat poison? That’s ridiculous. Rats are dangerous vermin. They spread germs. They have fleas. They even carry bubonic plague!
HEATHER: Mom, you’re so behind the times. Sure, rats have germs. So do people. Dogs have fleas, and you don’t kill dogs. And all that stuff about the bubonic plague, that’s just ancient folklore. It was fleas that carried the plague. It wasn’t the rats’ fault.
AMANDA: I don’t know. I just don’t like rats. They scare me.
HEATHER: Everything’s scary until you understand it, Mom. Rats are living beings just like we are. And rats never started a war, or poisoned the air or caused global warming. Human beings are the really dangerous animals on the planet. If any animal ought to be exterminated, it’s us.
AMANDA: But what about all those news stories about plague outbreaks?
HEATHER: The most important thing is not to let the stories panic us. Let’s face it. There are too many people in the world anyway. The plague is Nature’s way of keeping the population down. It’s kind of beautiful when you think about it.
AMANDA: I guess you’re right, honey. I guess I’ve just been old-fashioned and bigoted against rats. I have to become more accepting.
HEATHER (Close up. Full face, smiling.): That’s right, Mom! Human beings and rats can be friends. All we have to do is accept that they have as much right to live as we do. If you need more information, call 1-800-555-PETA, and ask for the booklet, “Learning To Live With the Pandemic!”
END
(Note: I fully expect to see a public service announcement something like this before I die. Probably shortly before I die.)
If any animal ought to be exterminated, it’s us.
Wasn’t this more or less the theme of M. Night Shyamalan’s The Happening?
Didn’t see it. Wouldn’t be at all surprised.
Don’t see it. From all I understand about “The Happening,” it’s a waste of time–more so than many other movies. You know of movies so bad they are fun to watch? This isn’t one of them.
So I’ve heard.
I’d be more concerned aobut the poisoned rat wobbling back into its hole in my wall, and kicking the bucket there … to create a lasting stink I can’t get rid of without tearing out sheetrock.
That, or having the beastie leave the house and getting eaten by some critter I like (oh, say, my kitties or a passing raptor) and having Fluffy also die because of ingesting trhe rat poison.
Use traps, not poison!!