This year’s winner of the Bulwer-Lytton Fiction Contest for Bad Writing is the shortest entry to win in 30 years. Here are the 26 winning words Suzanne Fondrie submitted for this profound, profound honor:

Cheryl’s mind turned like the vanes of a wind-powered turbine, chopping her sparrow-like thoughts into bloody pieces that fell onto a growing pile of forgotten memories.

Also of note, this year’s runner-up is a local man, Rodney Reed of Ooltewah, Tennessee. See what he wrote here. (via Books, Inq.)