Tag Archives: Pumpkin pie

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Pump up your pumpkin pie

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Every few years, I like to perform the public service of providing my mother’s pumpkin pie recipe, which is now known in the family as “my” pumpkin pie recipe. But I don’t mind taking false credit, since I’m pretty sure Mom got it from somebody else in the first place.

I took time from my busy work schedule and madcap whirl of social obligations this morning to make pies for our family gathering tomorrow, at an undisclosed location. The picture above is not those pies; it’s a picture I took of a long-departed pie pair from a bygone year. But they are enough, they will suffice; I did not make any notable innovations.

The thing about this recipe – WHICH IS REALLY SIMPLE – is that it produces a more nuanced pie. There are people out there, I understand, who like the traditional pies with their in-your-face, extreme, street-level pumpkin spice flavor. If you’re one of those, God bless you. Enjoy your gustatory shock.

But if you like things a little more gentle, here’s what you do:

  1. Follow all the instructions on the can of pumpkin pie filling. All brands work equally well, in my experience.
  2. Instead of the two eggs called for in the recipe, make it seven (7). YES! SEVEN EGGS! DEFY CONVENTION!
  3. Pour the resulting mixture into two (2) deep dish pie crusts.
  4. Bake as instructed.

What you get is two (2) delicately flavored, custardy pies.

Enjoy.

And if you think of it, pray for whatever long-dead lady in Kenyon, Minnesota Mom lifted this recipe from.

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Follow these 4 crazy steps for a better pumpkin pie!

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Photo credit: Famartin. Creative Commons License via Wikimedia Commons.

I think it’s been a few years since I’ve performed my Thanksgiving act of public benevolence by sharing with you my mother’s pumpkin pie recipe. This is the only kind of pumpkin pie I actually like. And, since I’m a ridiculously picky eater, you’ll probably like it too.

The recipe is simple. Stupidly simple. You don’t need to print it out — you’ll remember it.

  1. Do everything it says in the instructions on the pumpkin pie filling can (any brand will do), EXCEPT:
  2. Instead of using 2 eggs, use 7.
  3. Pour into 2,, not 1 deep dish pie shells.
  4. Otherwise, continue following step 1.

That’s it. The result is 2 light, custardy pumpkin pies. No need to thank me; the warm sense of magnanimity I feel is reward enough.

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Enhancing your life for the holidays

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“An Early Spring,” by the American primitive artist Grandma Moses (1860-1961). We had curtains printed with this pattern in our house when I was growing up.

It isn’t often I actually have a busy day. But this was one, at least by my sedentary standards.

However, it was a good day. I’m still slightly elevated in the wake of Atlantic Crossing winning the Emmy award. You can expect me to mention it, ever so casually, for the next few years. Or at least until the next Emmy win. Shoot, I could conceivably be marginally associated with an Oscar someday.

The first big job today, after my obligatory run to the gym, was baking pumpkin pie. Last year, for reasons too obvious to mention, my family did not gather for Thanksgiving. And so I made no pies, because it’ silly to bake two pies for my sole use. But this year – it was just decided – some of us are getting together. So I made my pies. The best pumpkin pie in the world, I say with all due modesty.

I baked them, and I shamelessly sampled one. Maybe it’s because I haven’t had any for two years, but it seemed to me especially good. So the first job was a success.

The second job was paying my bills, which is usually a Thursday job, according to my personal liturgical calendar. But garbage men must adjust on Thanksgiving, and so must I. Thanks be to God, my social security deposit had cleared yesterday. So I was in good shape for writing the checks. (Not sure when I’ll get paid for my new client’s job.)

Then I had to do some minimal housecleaning. Not because the place is mostly immaculate and just needs a touch-up (ha ha). Rather, because someone was coming by on business, and my home was such a magpie’s nest that a few things had to be moved around so there’d be one flat place where documents could be laid down.

The aforementioned business was refinancing my mortgage. It’s a good time to do it, and I found out I could save about a C-note a month without extending my payment schedule much. In times like these, it seemed prudent.

So the notary showed up at last, and he shepherded me through about 67 signatures. Some of them required dates, and the dates have to be entered in a particular format. Nevertheless I made it through, and now the deal is done and I have that accomplishment to savor. Almost as if I’d been productive. A penny saved is a penny earned, as Franklin said (or is rumored to have said). So that’s as if I earned $1200 next year.

If you discount inflation.

I still have some preparation to do for Thanksgiving, but I’m feeling good about the day. And in that spirit, I shall enhance your life. I shall enhance it by sharing my mother’s pumpkin pie recipe, which ought to make your own life at least $1200 better:

MY MOTHER’S PUMPKIN PIE RECIPE

1. Look at the recipe on the can of pumpkin pie filling (I found Festal this year! That’s the brand we had when I was a kid! Haven’t seen it for years).

2. Follow that recipe precisely, with only two changes:

3. First change: Use 7 eggs instead of 3.

4. Second change: Pour it into two deep dish pie tins instead of one.

5. You’ll end up with two mild, custardy pumpkin pies that even people who don’t like pumpkin pie will like.

6. That’s it. Remember to be thankful for Lars Walker’s generosity. Checks and bank transfers will not be refused.

A blessed Thanksgiving to you and yours.