Category Archives: Reading

Thinking about Don Quixote

“…and to put the whole thing in a nutshell, I persuade myself that all I say is as I say, neither more nor less, and I picture her in my imagination as I would have her to be, as well in beauty as in condition….”

I am now about a third of the way through Don Quixote by Miguel de Cervantes. It’s quite a trek, and it offers ample fodder for thought. This thought, of course, I propose to dump in your lap.

It would be easy to call Don Quixote an attack on “chivalry.” It is that, in the sense that it parodies a literary genre called “Chivalrous Romance.” However, it’s far from an attack on the concept itself. Considering the general (low) character displayed by so many of the world’s great writers, Cervantes stands as something like a paragon. He fought bravely for his king in the Mediterranean wars against Islam, suffering a permanently crippled left hand (or arm) at the Battle of Lepanto. He was captured by Barbary pirates and enslaved for five years, leading several escape attempts, which all failed. In each case, he endured torture and refused to name any of his partners – in one instance nearly being executed. (Eventually he was ransomed.) He did father an illegitimate daughter, but he acknowledged her and saw to her upbringing.

What Cervantes seems to recognize in the Chivalrous Romance genre is, first of all, its poor quality. He was himself a great writer, and had no patience for shoddy work. But he seems to particularly object to the unreality of the stories. As a disabled veteran, he knew the real face of war. He must have found many of the Romances contemptible, just as a genuine secret agent might sneer at a James Bond movie from the Roger Moore era.

He sees even more, though. Don Quixote, through excessive reading of such pop literature, has lost touch with reality. He has entered a virtual world, walking around like a gamer in Google glasses, stumbling over actual physical objects in his path.

Andrew Klavan says that one of the most common objections he hears from Christians in regard to his fiction is, “But fiction isn’t real!”

Good fiction is real, in a profound sense (related to subcreation as Lewis and Tolkien understood it). But trash literature, written to amuse the reader through catering to his predilections and sugar-coating life’s tragedies, does interfere with serious, moral thought. (Straight farce, as in Wodehouse, I would insist, is another matter.)

Or so it seems to me.

Errant in La Mancha

A further counsel bear in mind:
If that thy roof be made of glass,
It shows small wit to pick up stones
To pelt the people as they pass.

“Sir, one solitary swallow does not make the summer….”

“…for it is my great familiarity with thee that has bred this contempt.”

I’ll need to beg your forbearance for a few days – or weeks. I feel I must cut back on my book-buying for a while, so I made up my mind to tackle one of those big, classic books that I’ve been putting off. Therefore I chose Don Quixote by Miguel de Cervantes. This project must inevitably take a long, long time, because it’s a long, long book.

I’m not unacquainted with Don Quixote, since I read an edited version back when I was in high school. But I recall a college professor saying that shortened versions omit some of the most delightful parts. I’m curious to see what those delightful parts are, because – to tell the truth – what I’ve read of the book to date has never given me a lot of pleasure.

[At the top of this post I list a few common aphorisms I found in the text. Whether Cervantes coined them or borrowed them, I have no idea.]

I think of Don Quixote as “the book that, when they wanted to make a successful musical out of it, they had to turn its meaning completely on its head.”

Which brings me back to my old do-it-yourself psychological diagnosis – you can figure out any person’s neurosis through discovering what they don’t find funny. When we neurotics recognize ourselves in a joke, the humor drops abruptly through the floor.

I, for instance, am not much amused by stories about deluded bookworms who make fools of themselves in the world, and get laughed at behind their backs.

Anyway, I’m still less than a quarter through in my reading, and I’ve come up with one thought that may or may be of value: Don Quixote is the ancestor of the modern college graduate, who has been force-fed so much otherworldly theory that he can’t see reality at all. The liberal who observes a city sidewalk covered with homeless tents and human excrement, and calls it “vibrant,” is brother to Knight of the Doleful Countenance, who thought windmills were giants and country inns castles. The liberal who sees a tattooed thug beating up an old woman to steal her purse, and calls him a victim of racism, was foreshadowed when Don Quixote liberated a group of convicts on their way to the galleys, only to be pelted with stones by them.

A day trip, and historical meditations

I shall tell you the tale of my adventures last Friday. I was part of a group of members of the Georg Sverdrup Society, and we went to visit a seminary not our own.

I think I won’t mention the name of this seminary, though there’ll be enough clues to work it out, if anybody cares to. It is an impressive cluster of buildings on an impressive campus, with a  history going back to the 1870s. However, the church body it serves, which I generally refer to here as the Very Large Lutheran Church Body That Shall Remain Nameless, finds itself now unable to support the institution’s real estate, so the property is being sold. The seminary will continue, but in more modest quarters.

Because of this approaching change, our society president arranged a visit. It would allow us to view the buildings, the library (now being packed up) and the archives (soon to be packed up). We got to see a number of interesting items on display. Below is a copy of Martin Luther’s death mask, with matching hands (his right one swollen and cramped from much writing). Luther was a man who liked his carbohydrates:

There was also the legendary bust of Hans Nielsen Hauge, the Norwegian lay evangelist about whom I’ve written a lot on this blog. I had the pleasure of informing those present that this bust is not actually a portrait, but the product of an artist’s imagination, originally carved in wood for a ship’s figurehead.

Our guide was very cordial, so nobody mentioned the well-attested fact that seminary students have a tradition of holding a beer bash on Hauge’s birthday, with the bust present, in order to demonstrate their contempt for the man and his movement.

We also got to visit Old Muskego Church:

Old Muskego Church from Muskego, Wisconsin is often called the first Norwegian Lutheran church building in America. This is not true – I, for one, favor the Haugean church in Fox River, Illinois. But Old Muskego, which was moved here in 1904, is the oldest surviving one. A new location will have to be found for it. All our guide would tell us was that they were in negotiations about the matter. I have my suspicions, and I wish the project well. The old place deserves preservation.

We sang the old Scandinavian hymn, “Children of the Heav’nly Father” in harmony before we left.

Afterward we wove our way through circuitous highway repairs to Lakewood Cemetery, traditional resting place of Minneapolis’ great and good. There we visited the graves of Professors Georg Sverdrup and Sven Oftedal, the founders of the Lutheran Free Church. Our guys.

This outing got me thinking about our tradition, the Haugean movement, and its place in history.

Continue reading A day trip, and historical meditations →

My top ten mystery list

Photo credit, Getty Images via Unsplash license.

Today is my birthday. Don’t ask which one. If anybody out there wants a birthday, you can have one of mine. I have a lot more than I need.

My friend Hunter Baker, of North Greenville University, has given tongue to the voice of multitudes, thus: “When, oh when,” those multitudes ask, “will Lars Walker offer a Top Ten list of his favorite mystery novels?”

To which I reply, “Why would anybody care what my favorite mystery novels are?”

Nevertheless, the challenge has been delivered, and I shall endeavor to give satisfaction.

First, some clarifications.

This list is not, and does not purport to be, an actual list of Best Books. There are whole swathes (I’ve grown uncertain how to pronounce that word: I’ve always rhymed it with “moths,” but other people rhyme it was “lathes.” Most troubling) of the mystery genre which I’ve rarely or never tried. Especially in the Cozy vein. Many passionate (sometimes frightening) people are devoted to Cozies; I haven’t got the nerve to laugh at them. I’ll just note that Cozy is not my cuppa arsenic-laced tea and, having writ, move on.

Agatha Christie remains, I believe, the most popular mystery writer in the world. I’ve read some Christie, but was not won over. Her focus is on the puzzle, not on the characters. Her readers delight in following clues and trying to figure out whodunnit before the Big Reveal at the end.

Me, I gave up solving mysteries long ago. On the rare occasions when I’m able to outthink the sleuth in a story, it’s usually because the author tipped his/her hand through trying to misdirect me in some way, and I caught him/her at it. I’m a better storyteller than a detective.

I read mysteries mostly to live vicariously through the characters and to observe them acting in extreme situations. I am not a man of action; I’ve managed to cram, I’d estimate, ten or twelve years of living into my three-score and several years of life.

With all this understood, here’s my Top Ten list. Purely personal, biased and subjective. Delivered with no authority whatever.

Continue reading My top ten mystery list →

Milestone

Photo credit: aaronburden. Unsplash license.

I hesitate to post this, because it sounds like bragging – even worse, it sounds like bragging about a spiritual matter. Even worse, I might actually be bragging and in denial about it. Maybe I can pour enough self-deprecation on to counterbalance the sin of pride.

Last night, at bedtime, I finished the Book of Malachi in my Bible (I always do my bedtime Bible reading in Norwegian, to multitask, stacking education on top of edification. I’ve done this for more than 50 years.) I started (in English) when I was in confirmation class at church; I must have been about 13 years old. I’m now… considerably older.

Since I read from the Old Testament and the New Testament at different times of the day, I get through the New Testament several times for every full reading of the Old Testament. I don’t know how many times I’ve read the New Testament. But last night marked my 20th reading of the O.T. (Actually, it may be my 21st. There was a time I lost track of the hash marks I put in the inside cover; I opted for the lower count to be sure I wasn’t cheating.)

At the rate of one chapter a night, five nights a week (I give myself a break on weekends), it takes me a little over four years to read the Old Testament through.

Twenty readings seems to me like a milestone. I could have racked up more hash tags, certainly; there have been periods in my life when I got out of the habit, not without guilt. (At one point I grew deeply concerned about my spiritual state, as I was having such a hard time picking the book up at night. Then it occurred to me that the print was awfully small. I procured a pair of reading glasses and found my spirituality restored.)

I’m sure there are a lot of people who’ve read the Bible more times than I have, adjusting for age or not. Some people follow reading plans that get them through the whole thing (New Testament included) in a year. I respect that, but I’ve never felt right setting goals in my Bible reading. It’s like scheduling visits to one’s grandmother.

There was an age when the number of times you’d read the Bible earned you esteem in the United States. Emotionally, I suppose I still live in that time.

Rewards in Heaven? I believe there are such things, but I generally don’t consider them in practice; when we get Over There, we’ll cast whatever crowns we’ve acquired at the feet of the King. So the only reward I expect for my Bible reading is whatever wisdom manages to work its way into my mind and spirit. That ought to be enough. Adults don’t expect a reward for eating healthy food – the food’s effects are the reward.

How to Develop a Precocious Mind

Young writer Bethel McGrew describes growing up with scholarly parents in a house of ten thousand books.

The ideological benefits of homeschooling are obvious, but besides these I’m moved to reflect on this simple freedom of time—time to train my attention on good and beautiful and difficult things, to furnish my mind with them at my own pace. I have sadly lost some of that gift of attention in the digital age. I flip through a decades-old memo pad logging all the books I read in a given year, in between the little to-do lists I would make for an afternoon of reading, chess study, or whatever else nine-year-old me was working on, and I’m filled with envy.

Bethel is a good columnist with strong opinions of her own, not simply all the correct ones. I recommending her Substack and whatever she releases into the wild, like this piece today on what the revival of Michael Jackson says about America.

Tivoli Fest in view

A moment in the Viking camp at Tivoli Fest, years ago. Several of these people are no longer alive.

Dropped a book I was reading today. Yet again. I’m old, and have only so much time left; why should I waste any of it on novels that insult me?

This book (which I got in a free offer) was passably written (though the author had a tendency to misplace modifiers). I was giving it a fair chance. I thought it was moving a little slowly, and the characters were somewhat hard to keep straight, but that’s probably because I’m old.

Then the two detectives (one white male, one black female) interview a young male slacker whose ex-girlfriend has disappeared. The b.f. detective thinks he’s a suspect. The w.m. detective says maybe she could give him a break; he just got bad news about his ex. The w.m. retorts that he’s just a typical white male; no responsibility.

And the w.m. male apologizes.

Apologizes.

I didn’t care for the slacker character myself, but his sin wasn’t that he was a white male. Is that the new acceptable stereotype – white males are all shiftless? Seriously?

Into the bin with that one.

I had a scary moment with my car too. Went to the grocery store, and as I left the parking lot I heard a dull rattling sound from the rear end. Feared the worst.

Then I thought, that sounds a little like wood bumping on plastic. It could be my wooden apple crate, in which I keep my linen table cover and various informational signs and promotional items for my book sales. I’d just loaded it in the back of the cargo area.

So after I got home I offloaded the crate and tried driving around some more. No noise. Great was my relief.

Because I’m going out of town this weekend. A long Viking trip – not as long as the Minot drive used to be, but a good 5 hours, probably closer to 6 when you figure in lunch and comfort stops.

The event is the Tivoli Fest in Elk Horn, Iowa. If you’re in the neighborhood of southwest Iowa, you might check it out.

Elk Horn is a tiny town, only 600 or so residents. But it boasts two museums of Danish heritage – the Museum of Danish America and the Danish Windmill Museum.

It’s been many, many years since my group has gone to Tivoli, due to circumstances best left to history. Enough to say at this point that our invitation to participate has been renewed, and we’re happy to be going. It was always a great event. I recall especially the Saturday night fireworks, which apparently are still on the program. Elk Horn punches way above its weight when it comes to fireworks. I’ve seen far less impressive displays in far bigger communities.

And, of course, I will have books to sell. Looking forward to it. Pray for me, if you think of it, that my car will hold up and my sales may prosper greatly. Like a great… Dane.

In praise of Phonics

Photo credit: Michał Parzuchowski. Unsplash license.

My favorite teacher in junior high school was Mr. B_______ . He was a tall, lean, austere-looking man who served in many ways as my role model. He was also head of the English department, and I’m pretty sure he made a major mistake in that role.

I remember him saying to the class one day, “People ask me why we don’t teach Phonics in our schools. My answer to that is that English is not a phonic language.”

Which turned out to be partly true but short-sighted. If he were still alive, I hope he’d have admitted that.

I was reading the latest issue of Thinking Minnesota, the magazine of the Center of the American Experiment, a local think tank. It featured an article about teaching literacy in schools, and sketched the history of the Phonics/Whole Language controversy. “Whole Language” was a theory that began to gain influence in the 1950s. It involved students recognizing words on sight, using flash cards, rather than through the words’ spelling. I was not taught to read under the Whole Language model, but I know a guy who attended the same schools, five years younger than me, who did. When he reads anything, he tells me, and comes to a word he doesn’t know, he just guesses its meaning and skips over it. He has no other tools. That’s what he was taught in school under Whole Language theory.

For my own part, I remember being taught to “sound out” words in my classes. That was Phonics training. They taught it in school, but I remember the day I actually “got” it, and that was at home.

It was summer vacation. Somebody (my grandfather, I think) had given me, as a Christmas present, a subscription to the summer edition of The Weekly Reader. The Weekly Reader was a thin magazine (it no longer exists) published for school children as an aid to reading education. I had just gotten my first copy, and had sat down to read it. But I hit a word I didn’t know, and went to Mom.

“You can sound it out yourself,” she told me. “Look at the letters. The first letter is ‘b.’ What sound does ‘b’ make?”

I said, “buh.”

“Right,” she said. “Now the next letter is ‘e.’ What sound does ‘e’ make?”

And she walked me through the word (it only had four letters), and when I had them all, I sounded it out “BE-AR.” Not exactly phonetic, of course; she had to explain that you sometimes have to search around a little, but by means of context and running through familiar words, you could generally work it out.

And soon I was tackling one word after another. I was genuinely thrilled. I’d found the key to literature! From then on, I lived more and more inside books.

I suppose a large percentage of our readers are younger than me, and therefore Whole Language-trained.

If you can’t “sound out” words, I promise you it’s not a complex art. I learned it before my brain was fully developed. I bet you could work it out in an afternoon. Simply vocalize your way through the letters.

Just a suggestion.

In which I coach from the bleacher seats

Photo credit: Fotos. Unsplash license.

I pick up a fair number of novels through free and low-price offers from various sources. I made it about a third of the way through one of them recently before I dumped it. “Why did you do such a thing?” you ask, wide-eyed. I shall explain.

I won’t give you the title or the author; I don’t like dissing a book unless I’ve taken the trouble to finish it. And the prose was actually okay, if somewhat unimaginative. The book was part of an ongoing series. The series involves a private eye who’s struggling with a deteriorating relationship with the woman he fell in love with in an earlier episode. He’s also constantly bullied by the office manager at the agency he works for (she’s his boss’s mother). And he’s a slave to his cat.

What struck me about this detective “hero” was that he was almost entirely what’s nowadays called a “beta”. He’s supposed to be big and strong and capable of handling himself, but he’s constantly worrying about his relationship and his job and his pet. I began to suspect that the author of the book must have been a woman writing under a man’s name, but maybe it was a male author aiming at the female audience. Because this (in my experience) is how woman authors tend to frame their stories.

Make no mistake – I like my heroes to have home lives and relationships. I just don’t like to see them “simping” all over the place. (I’m pretty sure that if I ever had a girlfriend, I’d be a gold-medal simp, but that doesn’t make me admire such behavior.)

I’m going to say something now that will probably offend our female readers (there might be as many as five in all, I suppose). I think this whole feminism thing has been a misunderstanding.

You know the constant complaint women have about men? That men want to go ahead and fix things, while women simply want to talk about them? I think that’s our problem in a global sense.

The female point of view has been explained to me thus: When a woman talks to a man about a problem, she’s not actually talking about the particular thing she brought up. She just wants to talk about her general unhappiness, and that precise problem is only meant as an opening example. What she wants is to explore the whole range of her concerns. When the man jumps in and “fixes” it, he’s short-circuiting the process by which women naturally work through things.

I think feminism is the same thing, on a grand scale. The women of the world (or at least the West) said, “We’re unhappy. We can’t have careers like men do. We’re restricted to motherhood or nursing or clerical work.” So the men went ahead and fixed it. We gave them all kinds of opportunities, so that now they dominate the universities and are beginning to dominate business and politics.

And the women are more unhappy than ever.

Because that wasn’t the actual problem. They’re still waiting to work out the actual problem. Meanwhile, we’re surrounded by miserable female businesspeople, academics, and politicians.

I think we need to talk it all over again, and we men should listen this time.

Or rather, the rest of you men should. I’m old and single. I’ll just sit over here and read a book.

Early spring ruminations

Photo credit: nyegi. Unsplash license

We’re at the dirty end of spring right now. It was cold for a couple days, but we got up near 50 (Fahrenheit) today, and the whole week is supposed to be mild. (Thank Providence, I defrosted my freezer last week.) Most of the snow is gone now; just some crusty edges left – which doesn’t mean we won’t get more snow. We probably will. But that will be short-lived. The ground made visible now is unlovely – dead grass and black dirt. A monochrome, frostbit world.

This week is for me a wild social whirl, which means I had/have two things going on. Or three, if you call a doctor’s visit a social event. That was Monday. I had to see my clinic’s Diabetic Educator. As it says somewhere in Job, “The thing I have greatly feared has come upon me.” (Norman Vincent Peale quotes that repeatedly in his Positive Thinking books.) It actually wasn’t as bad as I feared. The nice lady didn’t put me on a diet. I’ve got some documents I need to get around to reading, but what I took away was mostly that I needed to consume fewer carbs and more fiber. Fiber, apparently, can buffer the carbs in your digestive system, reducing insulin spikes. Good to know.

(Note: I don’t have full-blown diabetes. But I am On the Road. Enough to make lifestyle changes advisable.)

The day before, Sunday, when I was still ignorant of this wisdom, I attended a Swedish Meatball Supper in a church basement. Meatballs for protein, and green beans for fiber to counteract the mashed potatoes. Could be worse. We were fed by Swedes, and it’s always pleasant for a Norwegian to be served by Swedes, after the humiliation of the Outrageous Union of 1814, which we have never yet forgiven.

I was impressed that they served us off china plates. I’ve eaten many a church basement meal, but I think it’s been a decade at least since I last ate in a church basement off anything but paper or Styrofoam. I cannot but salute the diligence of the organizers, who took the extra trouble to wash dishes afterward.

I must also salute my friends, Mark and Renae, who invited me along.

Friday is going to be less pleasant. I’ll be attending the funeral of one the guys from my men’s Bible study. A fine guy who loved the Lord. He used to wear bowties to church, so several of us from the study will be wearing them in his honor. I had to order one from Amazon, but I got next-day delivery, and it’s here now.

Reading notes: The book I’m reading right now (I’ll review it soon; maybe tomorrow) did something that pleased me a lot. A small thing, but it delighted me.

One point I’ve thought about occasionally, over my many years as a reader and writer, was a very trivial issue – the lack of same-name characters in fiction.

This is what I mean – in real life, people with the same first name often show up in the same circles. My Bible study group, for instance, though numbering only eight men on a good night, has two Toms and two Daves in it.

But in fiction, this rarely happens. The reason is obvious, and entirely sensible – it confuses the reader. Unless a plot point requires it, it’s so much easier to just give two characters different names. And since the author is the god of the fictional world, that’s his prerogative.

But in this book, there’s a scene where somebody says, “I was talking to Kate and Kate….” This wasn’t confusing to the reader, because Kate and Kate are throwaway bit characters who never appear again. But the line adds just a half-millimeter of verisimilitude, since we all know that such things happen not infrequently in real life.

That’s a nice literary touch. Wish I’d thought of it.